How do I divorce someone with mental illness in Connecticut?

Facing a divorce is always challenging, but when your spouse is struggling with mental illness, it adds layers of complexity, concern, and emotional weight. You might be worried about their well-being, how the legal process will work, and what it means for your children and finances. It’s a path filled with difficult questions, and it's completely normal to feel overwhelmed.

The short answer is yes, you can absolutely get a divorce in Connecticut even if your spouse has a mental illness. The state’s laws are designed to handle these sensitive situations, ensuring that the process is fair and that your spouse's rights and needs are protected. While the journey may require extra steps and careful consideration, it is entirely possible to move forward.

This guide will walk you through the specifics of how to approach a divorce involving mental illness in Connecticut. We'll cover the legal grounds, the step-by-step process, and how issues like child custody and financial support are handled when a spouse's mental health is a significant factor.

Understanding the Legal Foundation for Divorce in Connecticut

In Connecticut, you need a legal reason, or "ground," to get a divorce. While there are several fault-based grounds like adultery or desertion, the vast majority of divorces, including those involving mental illness, proceed on a "no-fault" basis.

The No-Fault Approach: Irretrievable Breakdown

The most common ground for divorce in Connecticut is that the marriage has "broken down irretrievably" (C.G.S. § 46b-40(c)(1)). This simply means that there is no reasonable hope of reconciliation. You do not need to prove that your spouse’s mental illness caused the breakdown or place any blame. You only need to state that the marriage is over.

This is almost always the recommended path for a divorce with mental illness in Connecticut. It is simpler, less confrontational, and avoids the need for extensive psychiatric testimony about the cause of the divorce itself. However, your spouse's mental health will still be a very important factor when the court makes decisions about property, alimony, and children.

The Fault-Based Approach: Confinement for Mental Illness

Connecticut law does provide a specific fault-based ground for divorce related to mental illness. You can file for divorce if your spouse has been legally confined to a hospital or similar institution due to mental illness "for at least an accumulated period totaling five years within the period of six years next preceding the date of the complaint" (C.G.S. § 46b-40(c)(10)).

This option is extremely rare and complicated. It involves a specific legal procedure outlined in C.G.S. § 46b-47, which requires:

Serving the divorce papers on your spouse, their conservator (if they have one), and the Commissioner of Administrative Services.
The court appointing a guardian ad litem to represent your spouse's interests if they don't have a conservator.
The court appointing two or more psychiatrists to evaluate your spouse and report on their condition.
You, the filing spouse, being responsible for paying the fees for the psychiatrists and the guardian ad litem.

Given the ease and availability of the no-fault option, this ground is almost never used.

Connecticut Law and How Mental Illness Impacts Key Issues

Even in a no-fault divorce, your spouse's mental health is a critical factor that the court must consider when making orders. The law requires judges to look at the complete picture to arrive at a fair and equitable outcome.

Alimony and Financial Support

When deciding whether to award alimony, and for how long, the court looks at many factors, including the "age, health, station, occupation, amount and sources of income, earning capacity, vocational skills, education, employability, estate and needs of each of the parties" (C.G.S. § 46b-82).

A significant mental illness can directly impact a person's health, earning capacity, and financial needs. If your spouse is unable to work or has substantial medical expenses due to their condition, the court will take that into account. This could result in an alimony award designed to help meet those needs. The court can also make specific orders for the support of a mentally ill spouse (C.G.S. § 46b-85).

Division of Property and Assets

Similarly, when dividing marital property, the court considers each spouse's health (C.G.S. § 46b-81(c)). The goal is an "equitable" distribution, which doesn't always mean a 50/50 split. If one spouse's mental illness prevents them from acquiring future assets or income, the court might award them a larger share of the existing marital property to ensure their financial security.

Parenting Plans and Child Custody

When children are involved, their well-being is the court's top priority. All custody and visitation decisions are based on the best interests of the child standard (C.G.S. § 46b-56).

A parent's mental illness does not automatically mean they will lose custody. However, the court is required to consider "the mental and physical health of all individuals involved" (C.G.S. § 46b-56(c)(13)). The judge will want to understand:

Does the parent's condition affect their ability to provide a safe and stable home?
Are they receiving treatment and managing their illness effectively?
Does the condition pose any risk to the child?

The court can order a custody evaluation or psychological assessments to get a clearer picture. It can also issue orders for a parent to participate in counseling or therapy if it's deemed to be in the child's best interest (C.G.S. § 46b-56(i)). The final parenting plan will be tailored to ensure the child's safety and promote a healthy relationship with both parents, which might include supervised visitation if necessary.

Step-by-Step Guide to the Divorce Process

Navigating a divorce with mental illness in Connecticut requires careful handling of the standard legal procedures, with special attention to your spouse's capacity and needs.

Step 1: Consult with an Experienced Attorney

This is the most important first step. An attorney with experience in complex family law cases can help you understand your rights, explain the process, and develop a strategy that is both effective and compassionate.

Step 2: File the Divorce Complaint

Your attorney will help you prepare and file the initial divorce papers with the court. You will almost certainly file on the no-fault ground of "irretrievable breakdown."

Step 3: Serving Your Spouse (A Critical Step)

Your spouse must be officially notified of the divorce. This is called "service of process" and is usually done by a state marshal. This step can be complicated if your spouse:

Is hospitalized.
Lacks the mental capacity to understand the legal documents.

If your spouse cannot comprehend the proceedings, they cannot meaningfully participate. In this situation, the court will need to appoint someone to protect their interests. This is often a guardian ad litem (GAL), who is a neutral attorney appointed by the court specifically for the case. If your spouse already has a legally appointed conservator, the GAL may not be necessary, and the conservator will participate on your spouse's behalf.

Step 4: Automatic Court Orders

Once the divorce is filed and served, a set of automatic orders goes into effect for both of you (Practice Book § 25-5). These orders prevent either spouse from selling assets, changing insurance beneficiaries, or taking the children out of state without permission.

Step 5: Financial Disclosures

Both parties must complete and exchange detailed financial statements. If your spouse is unable to do this, their GAL or conservator will be responsible for gathering the information and completing the forms on their behalf.

Step 6: Negotiation and Settlement

This is where the key issues of the divorce are resolved. The mental health of your spouse will be a central part of the discussion regarding alimony, property division, and the parenting plan. The goal is to reach a fair settlement agreement that addresses everyone's needs, especially those of your spouse and children.

Step 7: Finalizing the Divorce

Once you have a signed settlement agreement, you will attend a final court hearing. A judge will review your agreement to ensure it is fair and equitable under all the circumstances (C.G.S. § 46b-66). If the judge approves it, it becomes a legally binding court order, and your divorce is final. If you cannot reach an agreement, your case will proceed to a trial where a judge will make the final decisions.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ)

Will my spouse's mental illness be used against them in the divorce?

In a no-fault divorce, the illness itself isn't used "against" them to prove blame. However, the effects of the illness—such as their ability to work, their financial needs, and their capacity to parent—are relevant facts that the court must consider to make fair decisions about finances and custody, as required by Connecticut law.

How will my spouse's mental illness affect child custody in Connecticut?

A parent's mental health is a key factor in determining the child's best interests. A diagnosis alone does not disqualify a parent from having custody. The court will focus on the parent's stability, their ability to provide a safe environment, and whether they are actively managing their condition. The final parenting plan will be designed to protect the child while, if possible, fostering a relationship with both parents.

What if my spouse refuses to sign divorce papers because of their mental illness?

Your spouse does not have to agree to the divorce or sign anything for it to proceed. If they are served with papers and do not respond, you can move forward with a "default" divorce. If their refusal is due to a lack of mental capacity, the court will likely appoint a guardian ad litem to respond and act on their behalf, ensuring their rights are protected throughout the process.

Am I responsible for my spouse's medical bills after the divorce?

Generally, after the divorce is final, you are not responsible for debts your ex-spouse incurs, including new medical bills. However, the division of debts that exist at the time of the divorce will be part of your settlement agreement. Furthermore, the cost of your spouse's ongoing medical care and health insurance can be a significant factor in determining the amount and duration of alimony.

Can the court order my spouse to get treatment as part of the divorce?

While a judge cannot force an adult to undergo medical treatment against their will in a broad sense, the court does have specific powers related to children. As part of a custody order, a judge can order a parent to "participate in counseling and drug or alcohol screening, provided such participation is in the best interests of the child" (C.G.S. § 46b-56(i)).

What is a guardian ad litem (GAL) and why might one be needed?

A guardian ad litem, or GAL, is an attorney appointed by the court to represent the legal interests of a person who cannot do so themselves, such as a minor child or an adult with diminished mental capacity. In a divorce involving mental illness in Connecticut, a GAL may be appointed for your spouse to ensure they understand the proceedings and that their rights are fully protected.

How does a divorce with mental illness in Connecticut affect alimony?

It can have a significant effect. The court must consider each spouse's health and earning capacity when deciding on alimony (C.G.S. § 46b-82). If a mental illness prevents your spouse from working or supporting themselves, they may be awarded a higher amount or longer term of alimony to meet their needs.

Is it better to use the "confinement for mental illness" ground for divorce?

Almost never. This fault-based ground is procedurally complex, expensive (as you must pay for the court-appointed experts), and can be more adversarial. The no-fault ground of "irretrievable breakdown" achieves the same result—a divorce—in a much more direct and less contentious way, while still allowing the court to fully consider the impact of the mental illness on all other issues.

Getting Help and Support

Navigating a divorce is difficult, and doing so when your spouse has a mental illness requires an extra measure of patience and support.

Hire an Experienced Family Law Attorney: It is crucial to work with a lawyer who understands the nuances of a divorce with mental illness in Connecticut. They can guide you through the legal complexities and protect your interests.
Seek Personal Support: This process can take an emotional toll. Consider speaking with a therapist or counselor to help you manage the stress and grief.
Connecticut Resources: Organizations like NAMI Connecticut can provide support and resources for families affected by mental illness.

Conclusion

Divorcing a spouse with a mental illness in Connecticut is a legally and emotionally intricate process, but it is manageable. By using the no-fault ground of irretrievable breakdown, you can focus on reaching a fair resolution rather than assigning blame. The key is to ensure your spouse has the proper representation, whether through a conservator or a court-appointed guardian ad litem, so their rights are protected.

The court will carefully consider your spouse's health when making decisions about financial support and parenting, always aiming for an outcome that is equitable and serves the best interests of your children. With the right legal guidance and personal support, you can navigate this challenging time with compassion and move toward a new future.